Can Detachment Bring Peace ? | Detachment as key to Inner Peace | The Odd Angle

 

Can Detachment actually bring peace?

I, Rahul and Ravi the trinity of school friends planned a fair visit in Gwalior last week.

Ravi who recently finished his trimester came home in vacation while I have been enjoying vacations for last 8 days. I personally like spending time with these fellows it's flow of ideas, knowledge and wisdom. Even experiences with them has been learning one. 

As most of the fairs in India, this fair has wide range of options to experience thrill on swings. So we decided to get on giant Boat swing though Ravi has never been on it, he feared and I was also a bit anxious but Rahul was excited. 

To experience adventure we got into this giant iron boat, Rahul insisted to go at the high end but terrified Ravi and feared me insisted to sit in the middle, still rahul could convince us to go to high end, I and Ravi sat and grabbed the seat very tightly, tightened our safety belt while Rahul was sitting relaxed behind us. initially it was slow, we shouted and enjoyed but soon enjoyment turned into portrayal of enjoying, soon we were down with anxiety, nausea and fear.

Every time it went up our fear increased and when it came back I and Ravi would tighten grip and plead the operator to stop.

Sooner we found ourselves as one cumulative organic matter of different bodies with our consciousness struck in fear. Rahul seemed to be enjoying and have fun. He then came up with the psycho-spritual advice combined with terminologies of physics like freefall.

In a moment the fear started to move like water vapours from boiling water. Rahul asked us to loosen grip and let ourselves to fall freely. It changed the whole scene, Ravi and me who were almost nervous and nauseating started to feel more safe and calm. Our fear got transformed into thrill and enthusiasm. Too be honest such quick results with such a simple trick was almost magical. I personally have never been impacted so sooner with advices. 

However what moved me more was not this trick to counter swing nausea but life lesson that got learned on this swing with the advice. When i gripped my seat in swing, it was harder for me to bear the fall. 

The harder I tried to grip and control my position and remain still and stable the more fearful it got. The fear that i thought was due the high altitude and swing speed was actually due to my stiff and rigid grip for my stability. I and Ravi were constantly trying to control our situation but we were onboard a boat being run by an operator with a machinery and lever. There were other people also along with us on the swing boat.

How could we have controlled the whole situation when other people and factors are also involved? 

We couldn't and we can't. So best advice was to let it go with the flow and accept existing situation and stop controlling or resist the experience. It was this acceptance and letting of the stability that we desired that made us feel calmer and safe. However it striked me more deeply when i realised how many times in our lives do we try to control things around us which we can't, we are just involved in the situation and the experiences are not solely because of us but there is whole world that shapes our experiences and achievements but we constantly resist the existing situation. Our desires, our hopes, our expectations are just different manifestations to control external world around us inspired by our emotions of pleasure and pain. We too often fall prey to only actor fallacy, we think we are the one can and should control our feelings and outcome in the situation very often neglecting other factors and social actors.

I and Ravi also forgot about the lever operator, the people along with us and the boat itself, we thought we are feeling it and we are responsible so we have to control and we resisted and gripped seat more tightly. Though it didn't help a lot. We also try to be master of our lives, we try to control our situations and outcomes but we can't not and it even frustrates us further. Rather more simple approach to life may be of acceptance and of letting us freely fall through tough situations and it might happen that we start to feel calm and in control. Next time you find yourself in a challenging situation, acknowledge the presence of other factors and detach yourself from resistance comes from with in. The only actor fallacy puts you in trouble it feeds your ego by making you master of the world around you and with in you and simultaneously keeps you farther from simple solutions like Detachment and letting go. Remember it's better to enjoy with the flow and let ourselves into the situation.

The Odd Angle 

Even Buddha identified the root cause of suffering as "attachment" or "craving" (tanha). When we cling to something, we fear losing it, leading to anxiety, sadness, and anger. Detachment helps break this cycle. According to Buddha, detachment isn't simply about withdrawing from life or becoming cold and emotionless. It's a nuanced concept known as "non-attachment" or "viraaga," aiming to free oneself from suffering caused by clinging and grasping. 

Authored by: Jatin Mathur
Edited by: Ravi Jonwar